No Class Weds March 25th ~ How to Get Kids to Listen

Will miss seeing you this Weds morning, but better safe then sorry. Stay safe & cozy, at home if you can. And watch these short videos when you get a couple minutes. Goal is to keep you in the Love and Logic frame of mind. Love to hear any feedback on the below and/or updates. 

Here is a preview of session 4, which we will end up holding next Weds March 4th, on enforceable statements.  It's a short 3min video with Dr Charles Fay on how to find out whether your statements are Gold or Garbage. Please share with spouse, friends, family, anyone that may benefit. 

http://youtu.be/cOW6P43J3xM

How to get kids to do almost anything you want😜 aka modeling 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uRCqWcer-Nc&sns=em

Andrea L Gooldy

Parent Educator and Coach

404-932-9393 

No Class Wednesday /This Morning

Hi Class,

Just a reminder that there is no session this morning, Weds the 18th. Love to hear any updates on how using your one liners is going ( 'I know' ; 'I love you too much to argue') and/or giving choices. We will the reschedule the "uh oh song" session for another time that works for more of the parents. Our next session will be Weds the 25th on enforceable statements and how to model with great joy 👯. Hope the majority of you can make it, even if only for a portion of the session. 

I wanted to share a very positive testimonial from a couple out in California. I think it's particularly relevant because their child is 3, similar to several of you in this course! I like the examples of all the choices they are giving her! I hope you all will get some of the benefits that this couple has:)

Cheers,

Andrea 

Parenting Class Participant Testimonial

Thank you very much for teaching the Love and Logic class at Menlo Park Presbyterian Church. The parenting methodology my wife and I learned made an immediate and positive impact with our 3 year old daughter. It's as if we finally found the parenting instruction manual we've been looking for. We've embraced the four basic principles of: 1) building the self-concept, 2) sharing control and decision making, 3) offering empathy, then consequences after bad behavior and 4) sharing the thinking and problem-solving. We love the method of offering choices as much as possible and do so all day long to share control when we can and then take control when we need to without resistance. Previously, getting our daughter to brush her teeth was a battle. Now we simply ask her if she "would like to brush her teeth with her pink tooth brush or her green tooth brush" and she gets excited to brush her teeth because she has a choice and is involved in the decision process. When walking around busy areas, I simply ask my daughter if she would "like to hold my left hand or my right hand." At breakfast, I ask her if she would "like to have oatmeal or scrambled eggs." When bad behavior occurs, the empathy-consequences communication works wonders. The simple "uh-oh" song is a gem of a technique in its ability to stop bad behavior instantly now that our daughter is conditioned to it. We've also put a damper on whining with: "I hear you when your voice sounds big like an adult instead of whiney. A whiney voice sounds like 'I waaaant it. Give it to meeeee! A big voice sounds like, 'Daddy, may I please have this?' I hear big voices, not whiney voices." The techniques we learned in your class make so much sense, but we never would have thought of them on our own. It makes so much sense to shift from threats and warnings to the principles of Love and Logic that try to make life at home as similar as possible to life in the real world. The Love and Logic techniques have de-stressed our lives because now we're learning the specifics of what to do and how to do it. We have a lot more to learn but at least now we have the specific lessons of the Love and Logic framework to learn from.

Thank you for changing our lives.
Cate and Joseph 
Menlo Park, CA
Facilitator: Janada Clark

Andrea L Gooldy

Parent Educator and Coach

404-932-9393 

How to Handle Kids Whining and Arguing - Love and Logic

Hello there Class,

Just a short 4 min video by Charles Fay going over some of what we covered in our first session. Great reminder, plus good to share with spouse, grandparents, babysitter, etc. How is it going using your empathetic statement??? Remember, it's trial and error....keep experimenting until you find a statement or even a sound, that is effective. Goal is to calm yourself and give a signal to your child that no use in arguing or whining anymore. Going braindead requires a lot of practice too. Love an update from anyone who wants to share:) Our next session, this Thurs evening, will be on the "uh oh song". 

Check out this video on YouTube:

http://youtu.be/I0nTTkHCTVc

Andrea L Gooldy

Parent Educator and Coach

404-932-9393 

Are You a Helicopter Parent? Wendy Mogel

Hi Class,

I mentioned Wendy Mogul last session and her empowering approach to raising kids in her two books, "The Blessing of the Skinned Knee," and "The Blessing of a B minus." Here's a short 5 min clip that is so in line with Love and Logic and Montessori, particularly in having our kids learn consequences now, when price tag low, vs waiting until college to gain life experience and confidence. Interesting about the teacup and crispy fried labels....and how a lot of us are raising 'handicapped royalty.' I know I am guilty, sometimes, of doing too much for my son. As Wendy says, I need to pretend I have 6 kids! Gosh she just cracks me up with her sayings ~ another good one : 'Good parents Gone Bad.' Love to hear your thoughts after watching. I have a couple other Wendy Mogel videos I can forward if you enjoy this one. 

As far as L&L session 3, scheduled for this Weds am, which is on the "uh oh song," plus removing the offending object, please let me know who can make it. I may need to reschedule if I not enough parents can attend. I know Luisana cannot attend because she is away at the beach ~ lucky lady!!! 

Also love an update on how giving effective two choices is going....any reduction in power struggles? Or any progress using your empathetic statement? Anyone had a chance to pop in one of the L&L CD's? Just listening for a couple mins can give you some immediate tips and/or make you laugh, and produce a calming effect, particularly before your pick your kids up or when they get home from school. 

Check out this video on YouTube:

http://youtu.be/24Rdy3-pj-Y

Keep practicing, making mistakes, progress and learning:)

Andrea 

Andrea L Gooldy

Parent Educator and Coach

404-932-9393 

Fwd: Praise Junkies ~ Love and Logic Weekly Parenting Tips

Hi class,

As we discussed in this morning's session, here are the weekly L & L email tips that you can subscribe to by clicking down at the bottom. This email is in line with Montessori teaching about empowering our children to self-evaluate, self-correct and self-praise. I just made up the self-praise but you get the idea. 

Read below, after quote, or just press play to listen!

Life guided by an internal set of ethical principles…and a strong understanding of cause and effect…is far more likely to produce confidence and joy than a life dependent upon the fickle opinions of others.

Andrea L Gooldy

Parent Educator and Coach

404-932-9393 

Begin forwarded message:

From: "Love and Logic Institute, Inc." <reply@loveandlogicnews.com>
Date: February 11, 2015 at 12:35:18 PM EST
To: "Andrea Gooldy" <andreaparentcoach@gmail.com>
Subject: Praise Junkies
Reply-To: "No Reply" <noreply@loveandlogic.com>

- Are we raising a society hooked on praise? -

Click the download pictures button for the audio version of this week's tip.   Are we raising a society hooked on praise? Perhaps you know someone who doesn't feel whole…doesn't experience happiness…unless they are receiving acknowledgment from the outside.   Do we want our kids dependent upon the praise of others, or do we want them guided by a voice of personal responsibility residing in their hearts and their heads?   Far too many parenting and school discipline approaches rely on changing behavior by consistently providing praise and tangible goodies.   While occasional praise is fine, do we set our kids up for difficulties when we overdo it?   Life guided by an internal set of ethical principles…and a strong understanding of cause and effect…is far more likely to produce confidence and joy than a life dependent upon the fickle opinions of others.   Take the following quiz to see whether you are creating responsibly independent kids…or praiseaholics:   1.   When my kids succeed on a task, I recognize their effort and their good feelings…rather than telling them how happy it makes me. 2.  I demonstrate that I love them, even when I don't necessarily love their behavior. 3.  I allow my kids to see me resisting peer pressure…rather than always trying to project a perfect image. 4.  I provide praise rarely…and only when they have done something truly praiseworthy. 5.  My kids often overhear me talking about how I make my decisions based on my own beliefs...rather than seeing me make decisions based on what "everybody else is doing." 6.  I allow my kids to make affordable mistakes and learn from them…rather than constantly telling them what to do.   The more "yes" answers you gave, the more likely your kids will learn to resist peer pressure and lead lives where their happiness is based on doing the right thing rather than trying to please everyone.   In our CD, Shaping Self-Concept, Jim Fay gives parents and teachers the tools they need to help kids learn to look for their strengths and become motivated, confident, and proud.  Kids who will be able to keep going when the tough gets going and see themselves as winners.   Thanks for reading! Our goal is to help as many families as possible. If this is a benefit, forward it to a friend.   Dr. Charles Fay     Love and Logic Educator & Parent Retreat   Early Bird Special ends 2/13/15 This June join us at Vail Cascade Resort & Spa   Visit this page or call 800-338-4065 for more information.     Exclusive Member Discount    (CD) 25% off to Insider Club members only: $14.96 Regular Price $19.95    Enter Coupon Code "021115"     See Jim Fay in Boise, ID on 2/12/15   or in Seattle, WA on 2/17/15   Graduate-level credit is available. Register online or call 800-338-4065. If we're not in your city, check out a Love and Logic On-Demand Webinar or find a local trainer teaching parenting classes in your area.     Share Your Story Have you had success with Love and Logic techniques in your home, school, or classroom? We'd love to hear about it. For helpful tips, special promotions, and event announcements, join Love and Logic® on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and YouTube. Funny Parenting Stories and Funny Stories from the Classroom: amusing audios available for your listening pleasure, compliments of Love and Logic. Visit this page to download and enjoy.   © 2015 Love and Logic Institute, Inc. All copyright infringement laws apply. Permission granted for forwarding and/or for a single photocopy or electronic reproduction of one email tip only. Please do not alter or modify. For more information, call the Love and Logic Institute, Inc. at 800-338-4065.   View as Web Page

Love and Logic Institute, Inc.  •  2207 Jackson St  •  Golden, CO 80401 http://www.loveandlogic.com

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L & L Session 2 * "Avoiding Power Struggles"

L & L Session 2 * "Avoiding Power Struggles" through using Effective Choices 

Good Evening L & L parents,
Looking forward to catching up with you all tomorrow morning. I know a couple of you had said that you cannot make this session and/or you'll be late or have to leave early. All Good!

These sessions are held in the Springmont library, in the conference room. Springmont's address is : 5750 Long Island Drive, NW, Atlanta, GA 30327. Just park around the back of the cul-de-sac, if there are no parking spots available. If you park in the cul-de-sac, you'll need to move your car around 1130 for carpool. Please do not park in front of the dumpsters. 

For those of you who have not paid yet, please make your check out to Andrea Gooldy. Of course, I take cash too:) The tuition is $95 /course + $15 workbook so total of $110. Or, you can pay as you go at $25/session, plus workbook fee, if you would like one.   As always, graduates can attend, free of charge, as long as there is space. 

Please make note of our remaining session dates:

Feb 18th    : Session 3 - the "uh oh song" ~ Removing the Offending Object! 
Feb  25th   : Session 4  - enforceable statements
March 4th  : Session 5  - the energy drain

In Wednesday's morning session, we will learn how to create and give effective choices. Please bring your workbooks so we can do some of the exercises during class. In this session, we will prepare a list of possible choices. I want each one of you to leave the session having at least two choices to immediately give your child or children. It's time to start experimenting to see which choices work and which don't. 

** See how many choices you can give during the day ** 
Would you prefer to write the choices in your workbook, or on a sticky note?? You decide. Haha! See I am using it with you:) 

» The Science of Control «
The more we share, the more we have. The less control we share, the less we have. 

We can either share control on our terms, or force our kids to take it on their terms. 

~ Each choice we give our kids is like a little "deposit" into their subconscious "savings account of control." Even when choices seem small and a bit silly, they can be very powerful. This is because  choices create situations requiring children to think. ~ 

Here are some examples of possible choices:
"Do you want to eat a snack in the car, or eat as soon as we get there, before you play?"
"Are you going to put your shirt on first or your pants on first?"
"Do you want to wear your coat or carry it?"
"Do you want the blue cup or the red one?"
"Do you want to leave the playground in two mins or in five minutes?"
"Are you going to brush your teeth in your bathroom or mommy's bathroom?"
"Would you rather play nicely here while I am on the phone (or computer, making dinner, etc) or be noisy in your room?"
"Do you want to walk next to me while we shop or sit in the shopping cart."
"Do you want to get dressed quickly by yourself or do you want me to help you?" 
"Would you rather clean your room this morning or this afternoon?"

Love and Logic Guidelines for choices:
¤ Give 99% of choices when things are going smoothly. 
¤ Provide choices only on issues that are not dangerous and don't create a problem for anyone else on the planet. 
¤ Always offer two options, each choice that makes you happy. 
¤ In ten seconds flat, choose for the child if he or she doesn't.

As Jim & Charles Fay write in their book 'Love and Logic' Magic for Early Childhood ~ Practical Parenting from birth to 6 yrs old: 
"Wouldn't it be great if your children could learn, early on, that every choice they make affects the quality of their lives? A combination of Love and Logic can create this learning now, while they are still young."

In Hopeful, Happy & Harmonious 

Parenting ~

Andrea 

Andrea L Gooldy

Parent Educator and Coach

404-932-9393 

Love & Logic Early Childhood Parenting Course: Mornings Beg Weds Feb 4th at Springmont School 9:15 AM

Hi Springmont Moms Luisana, Fazia & Jen,

SO Happy I will be seeing all of you this Weds morning for session 1 of the Love and Logic Early childhood Parenting Made Fun! Series. Please forward on to any other parents (friends, neighbors, colleagues, family, etc) who might be interested in participating in this seminar. This workshop is appropriate for anyone who spends time with children: parents, grandparents, nannies, educators, caregivers, etc. Let's kick off 2015, together, on a positive parenting foot! We all have heard that knowledge is power, and I believe that support is Priceless 💜💟💜

The Love and Logic® philosophy, is an attitude, that allows you to make parenting both fun and rewarding, rather than stressful and chaotic. This workshop will provide practical tools and techniques that help adults achieve respectful, healthy relationships with their children from birth to 7 years of age. You will get words that work right off the tip of your tongue, less stress and more confidence. GET ready to laugh, learn, and take the exhaustion and frustration out of parenting. It's never too early to use Love and Logic!

Dates / Time : Feb 4, 11, 18 , & 25th + March 4th ~ Weds Mornings  9:15 - 11:30am 

Location       : Springmont School, 5750 Long Island Drive, NW, Sandy Springs, GA 30327 / Media Center

Tuition          :  $ 95 for 5 sessions + $ 15 Love and Logic workbook /$145 Couples + workbook

  **Drop-in Option $25/session **

Session 1: "Handling Misbehavior without Breaking A Sweat." 
The Power of Empathy 

Session 2: 

"Avoiding Power Struggles." 

Effective Choices 

Session 3: 

"Teaching Kids to Listen....The FIRST Time."

The Uh-Oh Song

Session 4: 
"Limits Create Happier Parents, Happier Kids, And Happier Families." Enforceable Statements 

Session 5: 
"What To Do When Your Kids Leave You Speechless." 

The Energy Drain

Cheers,

Andrea

Andrea L Gooldy, M.S. 

Parent Educator, Coach and Workshop Facilitator 

Independent Love and Logic Facilitator 'Early Childhood Parenting Made Fun!' 

'Parenting the Love and Logic Way'

Certified Screamfree Parenting Leader AndreaParentCoach@gmail.com 

Www.Loveandlogic.Com 

Www.Sunshineparenting.Com