Energy Drain

Here is a 3 min video on YouTube by a Love and Logic facilitator ~ I like how she explains it and shares her personal experience using with her 3 kids. Hope this helpful! I know her kids are older than most of yours. Please let me know if anyone has any success using or at least starts to use this technique. 
Remember, similar to using empathetic statements, the energy drain tool aids us in keeping calm just by saying the words, versus yelling, threatening, lecturing, etc. 

http://youtu.be/OkwkGr6P2FI

Happy Saturday:)

Andrea L Gooldy

Parent Educator and Coach

404-932-9393 

Wendy Mogel Talks

Hi Moms!

Before this gets off my radar, I wanted to forward these two videos. Luisana, I appreciate your reminding me, of what I have sent to you, that has been helpful such as the below 2 min video. The the video at the bottom is almost 15 mins, but worth watching! Wendy Mogel is definitely an amazing speaker and storyteller, with a great sense of humor 😃 We could all use some more laughter in lives and to remember to not take ourselves so seriously! 

Parenting Food For Thought by Wendy Mogel, author of "The Blessing of A Skinned Knee" and "The Blessing of a B-." 

Here is a 2 min video on YouTube via Why to say No More as well as  respectful, calm ways to say it. Personally, I see myself in the mom that says so many yes' then has my own meltdown because too permissive. Believe sometimes need trial and error to figure out some of the rules you are inflexible on. Love to hear comments after watching!

http://youtu.be/td5nswGp1WA

I particularly like this recent Ted Talk from Wendy Mogel. A lot of the info is geared more towards parents with older kids, but I know you all are thinking ahead, or you wouldn't have participated in this parenting class. 

http://youtu.be/zWqcfphKtO4

Andrea L Gooldy

Parent Educator and Coach

404-932-9393 

Making Sure Kids Learn from Consequences

Good afternoon to my Springmont Love and Logic class 💟

Just wanted to forward on this L & L weekly parenting tip

because I know we've had discussions about what happens if our kiddos actually enjoy the consequence, like time in their crib, bed, bedroom or think it's fun to help spray floor to clean up the milk that they spilled. Read on for more background on how best to tee up a situation where our little ones (an eventually bigger ones) can actually learn from the consequence. And to keep in mind that our real goal, when looking at the Big picture, is to raise the odds of having respectful, responsible and resilient kids. Looks like a couple of you can make it this Fri morning at Springmont for our final session! Let's meet at 9:15 am as I will need be done & packed up by 11:40am. Again, fine if arrive late or need to leave early:)

As I may have noted before, you can quickly subscribe to these weekly emails by going to the L & L website then just adding your email address. Believe the option is on the top right of the home page. Helpful to have these positive reminders, on a regular basis. And remembering to utilize your parenting village if you need support around coming up with effective choices, enforceable statements, how to be more empathetic, coming up with consequence that your child will learn from, etc. Of course, it often requires trial and error to figure a lot of what works and doesn't work ~ darn it!

Ask instead: "Was the problem solved? Was the damage paid for or repaired? Was the person's time or energy made up? Did the kid make it right?"   Or: "Do I have a wise friend who might help me find more logical restitution than lifetime grounding?"

Andrea L Gooldy

Parent Educator and Coach

404-932-9393 

Begin forwarded message:

From: "Love and Logic Institute, Inc." <reply@loveandlogicnews.com>
Date: January 8, 2014 at 12:32:25 PM EST
To: "Andrea Gooldy" <andreaparentcoach@gmail.com>
Subject: Making Sure Kids Learn from Consequences
Reply-To: "No Reply" <noreply@loveandlogic.com>

Have you ever had a kid take the wind out of your sails by not showing a lot of remorse or concern when you deliver a consequence? Has that ever made you really want to "drop the hammer"?   It happens to the best of us. When most people get off track, it is because they've lost sight of the real goal (respectful, responsible kids) and focused on a lesser goal (winning). We've all been there.   For me, the best results with consequences seem to happen when the focus is solving a problem — versus causing massive discomfort for the kid. Sometimes, those two things intersect, but do not (repeat) DO NOT panic when a kid actually enjoys fixing the problem. Many kids have enjoyed repairing damage or making some other form of restitution. This does not mean the kid 'won' (and you lost). It means we feel good about ourselves when we work to solve problems.   This is where some logic comes in. Avoid asking: 'Did the kid suffer enough?'   Ask instead: "Was the problem solved? Was the damage paid for or repaired? Was the person's time or energy made up? Did the kid make it right?"   Or: "Do I have a wise friend who might help me find more logical restitution than lifetime grounding?"    These questions can put us in a better mindset to respond with more empathy and less wrath. In our popular "Oh Great! What Do I Do Now?" CD (or MP3 download), Dr. Charles Fay unpacks the elements that help kids really learn from consequences. For maximum benefit, download it right away and listen a few times before delivering your next consequence.   Thanks for reading! Our goal is to help as many families as possible. If this is a benefit, forward it to a friend.   Jedd Hafer   Parents and Teachers Don't miss Dr. Charles Fay in  Atlanta, GA on Monday,1/20 or see Jim Fay & Dr. Charles Fay in  Newport Beach, CA onTuesday, 2/4  Graduate-level credit and CEU's are available. Register online or call  800-338-4065.  If we're not in your city, check out a Love and Logic   On-Demand Webinar or  find a facilitator teaching parenting classes in your area.   Exclusive Member Discount    This week save 25% (audio CD or download)  Oh Great! What Do I Do Now?   Discount price to Insider Club members only: $11.96  Regular Price $15.95   To shop our online store click on the link above, then "Add to Cart" and enter the  coupon code "010814"     Share Your Story Have you had success  with Love and Logic techniques in your home, school, or classroom? We'd love to hear about it. For helpful tips, special promotions, and event announcements, join Love and Logic® on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, and YouTube. Funny Parenting Stories and Funny Stories from the Classroom: amusing audios available for your listening pleasure, compliments of Love and Logic. Visit this page to download and enjoy.   © 2013 Love and Logic Institute, Inc. All copyright infringement laws apply. Permission granted for forwarding and/or for a single photocopy or electronic reproduction of one email tip only. Please do not alter or modify. For more information, call the Love and Logic Institute, Inc. at 800-338-4065.   View as Web Page

Love and Logic Institute, Inc.  •  2207 Jackson St  •  Golden, CO 80401 http://www.loveandlogic.com

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L & L Session 5 This Fri AM March 27th @ Springmont : "What to Do When Your Kids Leave you Speechless."

Hi parents!

Can any of you make it to class this Friday morning session, 9:30 to 11:30am, March 27th, at the Springmont Media Center? Please let me know as soon as you know! Even if you have not made to a session yet, or just to one, still worth dropping in to learn some more L & L skills!

Hoping Fri am will work better for several of you:) During this session we will be going over the energy drain and strategic planning strategy. I will send more info about this session on my next email.  

Have you ever found it difficult to come up with a logical consequence…even after giving yourself some time to think? Parenting becomes a lot less stressful…and a lot more fun…when we can fall back on delaying consequences when things get tough. In this session, we will hear from Jim as he describes a type of consequence, called the Energy Drain, that will fit just about any sort of misbehavior. Having occasional Energy Drains make parenting a lot simpler. Well, this will be our last Love and Logic early childhood session this Fri morning.  The title of this final session is: "What to Do When Your Kids Leave you Speechless." We will go over the Strategic Planning Session, and the Energy Drain parenting tools. 

Looking forward to catching up with several of you. Please let me know if anyone has had a chance to listen to some of the L & L CD's that I loaned out. Just pop in for a couple mins for a laugh and some new parenting ideas!

Cheers,

Andrea

"Each time you tell one of these (Love and Logic) stories, you will be reinforcing your new knowledge, and your Love and Logic skills will be easier to Remember and Use!"

Jim Fay 

Andrea L Gooldy

Parent Educator and Coach

404-932-9393 

This Weds March 4th L & L Session 4 at Springmont

Hello Love and Logic Parents!
Want to know how to get a child to do almost anything you want??? Model the behavior with Great Joy 😋!! 

Our next session is this Weds March 4th, beginning at 9:15 am, at the Springmont library. The title of session 4 is: "Limits Create Happier Parents, Happier Kids, & Happier Families." Please note that I am trying to get at least one more morning session, at Springmont, the week of March 16th or the week after. All depends on conference room availability. I will keep you posted. Please let me know who can make it this Weds morning by emailing me back. Thanks:•] 

This week our session will teach:
* Why kids actually crave the same limits they seem to dislike
* How to set these limits in ways that create cooperation rather than chaos
* How to end battles over getting your kids ready to go in the morning
* Many more tools for lowering your stress level

We will discuss Avoiding Unwinnable Battles by using Enforceable Statements ~ some of my favorites:

Unenforceable: "Quit Whining!"
Enforceable: "I will listen when your words sound like mine."
Or "I listen when you use your words"

Unenforceable: "Stop being Disrespectful!"
Enforceable: "Would you like to talk more softly to me, or talk more loudly to the mirror in your room?"
One of my girlfriends has used the below successfully with her 4 1/2 year old daughter: "Do you want to stay with me using your sweet voice or go be sassy, in front of the mirror, in your room?"

Unenforceable: "Stop picking your nose!"
Enforceable: " I will listen to you when your finger is out of your nose"

Unenforceable: 
"Use your manners!"
Enforceable: "I do things for kids that use 'please' and 'thank you'"

Unenforceable: "Get in your bed and lay down!"
Enforceable: "I read when you're laying down and quiet"

Unenforceable: "Lay down so I can  change your diaper. " 
Enforceable: "I take kids outside to play after they have a new, dry diaper on."

Above is just a teaser of what we will go over Weds morning. Hope to see you all, even if arrive late or need to leave early. All this learning builds on itself. The more you hear it, the more you see  it, the more you will be able to use these techniques on a regular basis. 

Cheers,
Andrea 

Www.loveandLogic.com
Andrea L Gooldy

Parent Educator and Coach

404-932-9393