Good Afternoon Screamfree-ers!
Some more reasons to "practice" being a mentor to our children or consultant parent, as Love and Logic calls it. Let's work on letting our kids struggle, just one task/activity at a time, often causing some discomfort for ourselves because we just observe rather than doing. One montessori teacher suggested, to a good mom friend of mine, to "sit on her hands" instead of getting over involved in helping her daughter. Struggling presents the opportunity for our little ones to gain confidence. Think about how you have become confident in certain areas of your life. I'll leave you with one of the guiding concepts of Love and Logic that is completely in line the Screamfree email below. "I don't become what I think I can. I don't become what you think I can. I become what I think you think I can." Happy Easter:)
Andrea
Check out my blog ~
Www.andreaparentcoach.com
From: The ScreamFree Institute <info@screamfree.com>
Date: Thu, 21 Apr 2011 03:00:03 -0500 (CDT)
To: <andreaparentcoach@gmail.com>
ReplyTo: The ScreamFree Institute <info@screamfree.com>
Subject: ScreamFree Tip of the Day: The Gift that Keeps on Giving
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| Share with a Friend | April 21, 2011 | Here's your daily parenting tip from ScreamFree | | "If you want to see what children can do, you must stop giving them things." -Norman Douglas, British Author (1868-1952) | | | | Hal'sTake: It’s an ironic twist of fate that the more things we give to our children, the less creative and self-sufficient they become with those things. I don’t claim to know why this is true, but I do know that I have seen the truth of it play out in countless families I’ve counseled and in my own. We all have good intentions when we give answers, goodies, and assistance to our children. We like to see them happy. We want them to have the things we never could. We want to give them a leg up in this harsh world. And if we’re honest, we’ll admit that sometimes it’s even less noble than that. It’s just easier to give your child something than to watch them struggle on their own without it. You want your child to learn the value of doing family chores, but the thought of fighting with junior one more time over folding the clothes just sends you off the deep end. Am I alone here? Here’s what we have to keep in mind when we are tempted to give our kids more and more. The best thing we can give our children is our confidence in them. When they can tell, through our actions, that we believe them to be creative and capable because we don’t rush to rescue them from boredom or hard work, they will start to believe in themselves. Then watch out. They’ll start doing things that neither of you thought possible. -Hal Runkel, LMFT, Author of ScreamFree Parenting and ScreamFree Marriage | |
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